DOHOMED

Today the Director of DOHO took on the vitamins and miscellaneous perishables in our cabinets. All is now catalogued. Marty and I have been given direct orders to no longer buy vitamins at Costco. Fair enough. We don't need to buy a year's supply of magnesium. 

I'm told the Christmas decorations are put away and my Christmas present is almost complete (reveal later!). Next on the Director's docket: the garage. Bwahahaha!

Oh yes, the only reason I'm writing this is because I'm at an impasse with my desk. 

Lest you think this is a complaint, Buckaroo is really enjoying his leadership role and we are enjoying watching him blossom. Plus, the house is less cluttered. 

Let's call this the "Before" picture.

The Director of DOHO

This morning, after Marty left for his gainful employment, Buckaroo, the Director of the Department of Home Optimization, called a work meeting. Given we had a quorum, he moved forward. 

First on the list, Christmas decorations would be coming down immediately. This wasn't terribly difficult. Because it rained every weekend from Thanksgiving to Christmas, there wasn't much outside decorating this year. Also, we opted to go small. We had a Charlie Brown-style Christmas tree, no lights, a few decorations, only two three four nativity sets*, a wreath on the door and garland around the fireplace. 

I then ran a few errands and came back to find the two young adults reorganizing the cabinets. Plus Buckaroo was cataloging all of the spare boxes, jars and bags we have--not a bad idea actually. I'm ashamed to admit I've bought too many jars of harissa at Trader Joes. The expired was tossed. The excess will be given to food banks in the local area. 

All in all, our home already feels lighter. 

Tomorrow, I tackle my desk. 

A couple of photos. 

Discussing with his sister how much hot cocoa she really needs. 

Deciding which hot cocoa is better. 

*It's a Catholic thing. I assure you, I have plenty more. 

Three-Time Winner

Corona night is always a hit. We eat dinner, play board/card games, laugh, and then laugh some more. Our cares, troubles and the world's problems are left outside and nobody leaves in a bad mood. Most games we play are more or less short in duration and for larger groups. Once in a while, we break up into two rooms and play a couple of different games at the same time. 

And then, once those who can't stay awake past 9 go home, Krissy breaks out Mexican Train. Generally there is anywhere between four and six of us, with threats of at least two calling it a night by 11--because Mexican Train is a REALLY LONG dominoes game that goes until after midnight, and sometimes after 2 a.m. 

Three Corona Nights ago, after the early birds left, Krissy brought out the dominoes. I brought out the peanut butter M&Ms (someone always brings them). And then moderately chill Patty, ultra-competitive Krissy and ultra-competitive Deb, the Queen of the Coronas and I, played Mexican Train until some wee hour of the morning. Much to Deb and Krissy's consternation, I won my very first game of Mexican Train. 

When I say "won," what I mean is I smoked them.  

In November, I also brought the peanut butter M&M's and as we sat down I pointed out that whomever brings the candy wins the game. They chided me but I went home with my second smoking victory. 

Now, there is no special skill or talent to this game. I just won because I won. However, this did not sit well with Deb and Krissy. 

So when Deb sent the group text out last week saying I was not to bring peanut butter M&Ms last Friday night. Most on the Corona text had no idea what that was about. However, there were two others who understood completely. I responded with "Bwhahaha." 

Though I didn't bring any candy, I did win my third Mexican Train game in a row. The closest score to mine was 150 points higher. Deb, the Queen of the Coronas threatened to not invite me back. Krissy seconded that. I told them both, that was fine, I'd just post my score cards on Facebook, showing everyone else their crushing defeat. 

The DOHO

You might have heard of the Department of Government Efficiency? Well, the Sunshines on Arizona Avenue have implemented the Department of Home Optimization, otherwise known as DOHO. The DOHO has only been in effect since Monday. However, the attitudes around here have shifted. We've had leftovers all week without complaint. My closet is cleaner. I'm coveting the plastic storage containers I've seen at Dollar General and Hobby Lobby.

Heading this department is Buckaroo, the family's unyielding starter-tyrant who is already making severe changes. 

"Mom, your desk is a disaster. I expect it to be resolved before January 1." 

"Polly, it's time to 'bless someone else'* with those clothes you don't wear that are cramming your closet."   

"Hey Dad, I think this weekend we should clean the garage. What? You are going to Little Rock with Mom? I can go. That way you two don't spend too much money at Trader Joe's." (We were planning on inviting him along.)

"Here's my white elephant gift." (Holds up an ancient stuffed-toy moose). "No point in buying something new." (At which point, Polly and I explained that perhaps something more adult would be appropriate for the adult Christmas party he was attending.)

Our DOHO didn't stem from a need to save money, it came about from the patches of clutter which cropped up in inconspicuous places and on my desk. Though we are generally tidy, there are pockets-- reams, actually--of paper generated from two college students and the avid Dungeons and Dragons players residing in my home. Additionally, we have an entire cupboard full of metal tumblers and I'm pretty sure they are unabashedly spawning. The cabinet over the refrigerator is now cram-packed full of candles nobody bought. And, would you look at that! I could wear a pair of socks once a day for a year and never wear the same pair twice. Now, to be fair, socks, candles and tea towels are common gifts around these parts. Plus, we moved from a severely larger home to the one we have now. Three years later, I still rummage through boxes stashed in the garage or the shed, looking for this and that. 

Here's to a more optimized home. 

*This just tickles me! This was the term I used when the kids were little and we were donating items.  

I'm Gonna See My Little Brothers Next Month!

Happy me! Just booked my ticket because I'm going to Florida to visit my brother, Darwin, in a couple of weeks. And later in January--I'm sorry, I STILL don't have an arrival date, but I know I'm going to be staying until at least February 11--I'm going to Phoenix to visit Squirrel. 

Though Darwin is 100 miles closer to me than Squirrel, I'll fly out of Little Rock. I hate driving through Florida more than I hate driving through Texas, I guess. Still haven't decided how I'm getting to Phoenix. 

Three Years Today

Today marks three years since we became Texans. 

Three years ago, I had a father and a cat. 

Three years ago, the family looked around in confusion, wondering where the bright sunshine, desert and pink houses went. What we found instead was a forest, four seasons and a place where possums unapologetically live in folks' back yards.     

Three years ago we discovered we are fabulous cooks. 

Three years ago we discovered donuts could taste amazing. 

Three years ago we discovered our Arizona winter clothes were inadequate.

Three years ago we discovered the locals own more than one rain coat, several pairs of warm gloves, hats, scarves and umbrellas. 

Three years ago we discovered we could leave our personal belongings in our unlocked car at the Walmart and find our personal belongings right where we left them.   

I told Marty when we left Arizona, I'd commit to living anywhere for five years. I'm pretty sure I can handle another two years in East Texas.

The A List

There were eight of us last night. Deb, the Queen of the Coronas went all out--dinner party style--with a grandly set table, centerpieces, and several types of forks. As I sat, listening to the conversations around me, I wondered how I got so lucky to meet these women. 

As much as I miss my Arizona peeps--and I miss them all--I'm grateful to have been welcomed unconditionally into this group for no rhyme or reason. Their culture and upbringing is so different than what I know. And yet... There is truly an awe of being included when starting over. And if that sounds hyperbolic, I remember rambling around Wake Village, mourning my daddy's passing, wishing I had a sympathetic ear at a time when I desperately needed a friend. So, I have some reasons. 

Forgive me. This time of year brings out the sentimental. It is exactly three years ago today that I saw my father for the last time. Three days later, we arrived in Texas. 

Anyway, mini-Corona night was a blast. We played some new Uno game (which the Sunshines are getting for Christmas), where one hand lasted three hours and there are "draw 10" cards. After half the ladies left, the four remaining played Mexican Train--a dominoes game, Krissy is very sorry she taught me, especially because I cleaned their clocks for the second time. 

Next week is the official Corona Night. There are sixteen Coronas, if we all show. It is obvious this past week's party was only for a select few. I'm honored to have been on that A-list. 

The Yep List

Well now, if I'm going to have a Nope List, why not a Yep List? 

This one seems easier. 

The 2025 Yep List

The Coronas. That's a no-brainer. Even though the 837 daily group texts can be tedious, the women continue to make me smile. 

Writing. Another no-brainer, and what I do during 90 percent of my week. 

Sewing. What I do when I have writer's block. 

Gardening. I see a pattern here: creative pursuits.

Yoga. I really should write a post on Texarkana yoga.  

Master Gardening. This is a sanctioned activity that requires a bit of scheduling. There are educational classes and volunteer opportunities. However those activities do not have to include the Community Garden Coalition or working with children.  

Some One-On-One Social Activities. What comes to mind: Once a month lunches with Joy and Leah. Once a month teas with Val. Once a month breakfasts with Suzy. 

The Thursday Lunch Bunch. Mainly, this is all Church of Christ ladies and me, their adopted whateverIam. There can be anywhere from six to twenty of us. I go a couple times a month and I've never been disappointed. 

Book Club Number Three. The women are fabulous. The discussion is lively. 

The Golden Quill Writer's Group. We just started this and it is taking off! Texarkana (and the surrounding area) needed a writer's group. I'm an officer until next year--at which point I happily give up my office to someone more worthy.  

One Writing Critique Group. (this is not the Golden Quills) I recognize I need this in my life because writing is a lonely pursuit and regular feedback is important. I had two critique groups at one time. Of those  people, I'm willing to keep one of those writers. In a perfect world, she and I start a completely new writing critique group. I should also add, even though the Golden Quill Writer's group has writers, that doesn't mean they have folks I want as part of my critique group. If one is writing about dragons, they don't want to read romance. If one is writing a mystery, a writer with a burning interest in Texas history probably doesn't want to critique a who-done-it. So, this takes a bit of finessing. 

The Nope List

When I first moved here, I had zero hobbies, no life and a lot of time. I said yes to every invitation that came along--not that many came along that first year. I remember walking around the grocery store,  trying to strike up conversations with strangers just to have human interaction. My activity level didn't pick up until last year, when I was test driving new hobbies and speed-dating new friends. This year was more status quo, and I learned something: I don't want this many hobbies and I don't need to have this many people in my life.

Though I'm grateful for these experiences, I'm ready to let some of these things go. Therefore, I've started my 2025 Nope List. 

The Gathering of Authors--as an author or volunteer In fact, I'm really okay if I have nothing to do with this event in any capacity for any reason at any point in the future. 

The Community Garden Coalition I haven't written much (if at all) about it. The short version is this: it is under the umbrella of the Master Gardeners. The woman who runs it has zero leadership skills whatsoever. Her husband is an insufferable know-it-all who dislikes anyone who challenges him with logic and facts. I'm not a good long-term fit because: 1) There's no future vision for this group, and when I've pushed the woman in charge, what I've discovered is that if I'm not careful I could be the one running it in a couple of years 2) The husband and I butt heads. It's best to bow out gracefully, while this group is still in its infancy. There are other opportunities I can find within the Master Gardeners. 

Leadership Roles At the last Master Gardener meeting, the issue of needing people to serve as officers came up. Some %#^&$! piped up and nominated me for treasurer. Obviously this person has no clue, because any soul who's had two conversations with me knows better than to put me in charge of a detailed spreadsheet of numbers. I said, "I'm not a good fit, plus, I'm going to have to miss several meetings next year." Or at least, I'm now going to miss several of them. Speaking of leadership roles, I'm currently the secretary of the Golden Quill Writer group. It was supposed to be until January, however, we recognized changing officers three months into this new group was foolish. What I do isn't difficult and takes very little time. But I'm a one-term secretary. 

The Saturday Book Club I like these ladies, however, most of the time, they don't read the book. They just get together, have a (terrible) lunch and catch up from the last time they saw each other. I hate going and finding out I took the time to read the book and have put effort and thought into the story only to discover nobody else did. 

The Library Book Club These folks aren't my peers. There's no discussion. The facilitator asks us to rank the book 1-5 and would we recommend it to a friend? Most of the time the books aren't that great or thought-provoking.  

The Tuesday/Friday Lunch Bunch I don't think I've written about these women. They are wonderful and get together twice a week. They aren't religious, are known to drop an occasional swear word when the occasion calls for it and have a variety of broad perspectives on any given topic. I'm not real active with them, however they are still welcoming when I show up. Though every time I'm with them, it is an enjoyable experience, they just don't meet at a convenient time for me. Also, I am the youngest of this group by about 12 years. Of all that I am letting go, this is the one that makes me the saddest.

Sacred Heart Catholic Church I still go to St. Edward's Catholic Church (St. Ed's) on occasion. But I'm done with Sacred Heart. The church is dirty. The priest insists on incense (an old Catholic tradition designed to accelerate the climb to Heaven through suffocating parishioners). This particular priest also likes to shake his finger and tell those who took the time to show up how those who aren't in the pews are destined to a potential damnation. At least at St. Ed's, the priest just gives a nice history lesson based on the Gospel reading. He's much more interesting and less damning. Plus the church is clean and I can breathe. 

All Committees Related to Sacred Heart Catholic Church I am not currently part of any committee related to Sacred Heart Catholic Church. However, I get regular text messages from the Ladies Auxiliary and a couple other committees someone thought I needed to be on. I never respond because I never volunteered to be on these committees. I'm now ready to reply to the group texts and ask that my name be taken off the roster. 

Angel Quilters I tried out this group. They have a great mission. They make quilts for cancer patients. I have zero issues making quilts for cancer patients. I have zero issues making quilts and giving it to the Angel Quilters to pass on to cancer patients. I have a million issues with spending five hours every Tuesday afternoon with these women while they bash whatever they are grumpy about on this particular day. The last time I went, they went on a collective rant about how stupid and greedy realtors are. Given I was outnumbered, I saw no reason to correct their collective opinion. There've been other collective rants I haven't agreed with, and five hours a week of group-think is a little too much. 

Nominated for the Nope List 

One of my online writing groups I have two. Both have been in hiatus. Neither group has the personality profile where I would feel comfortable suggesting they be combined into one bigger group. Additionally, I'm finding I only miss ONE member from ONE group and her specific writing feedback. Given I own the Zoom account, they count on me to facilitate this. I don't have a desire to facilitate at this time. 

The reason I'm not taking this off my list just yet is because we haven't been meeting. If the groups (except the one writer I mentioned) die out that's fine. If I can find a different writing group (bringing in the writer I mentioned), I'd be fine with that.  

I'm Bringing Pasta Salad

 A quick note went out to a select few folks: 

"Mini Corona night Friday. Theme: Italian food. I'm bringing garlic bread. Tell us what you are bringing for dinner." 

Goodness! After my first year in Texarkana where I watched paint dry and looked forward to the mail carrier stopping by just so I could say hello to someone--anyone--a text message like this is still a treat. I'm so tickled to have been on this list, because the "real" Corona night is next week--with everyone. This is more of an intimate group of--dare I say it--A listers. 

Come to think of it, this list could also be the ones Krissy wants to beat in dominoes. Given I smoked her during our last game, I probably should let my ego fall a notch or two.