A Little Dignity

Tessa called me Wednesday morning. She wanted two things: first she wanted to see if Buckaroo was available for a manual labor job. I'm pleased she thought of him. 

Second, she wanted to tell me about yesterday's agent meeting. 

It was announced at the meeting yesterday that I have chosen to step back. Tessa said I met with her last Friday and decided I was too busy with my father's estate, working on the Great American Novel and the consulting I'm doing for the brokerage in Arizona that I didn't need one more thing on my plate. I never planned on working full time, and the Old Brokerage was turning into a full time endeavor. Therefore, we parted friends. All of that was true. And I appreciate Tessa's grace. 

Tessa shared with me that the agents were told I was a friend to the brokerage. I might be hired in the future to handle small consulting projects here and there (she had mentioned it to me last week but I'm thinking, nope.) and I might stop by once in a while to say hello (um...). Plus, expect to see me invited at social events here and there--and please make me feel welcome (if they didn't make me feel welcome for the six weeks I was employed, I don't see them making me feel welcome for a two hour party). All that was nice to hear. It made the break off a bit more palatable. At least for me. I appreciate the lengths Tessa went to quash the junior high school girls' agents' backstabbing antics backlash.

Texarkana Quirks

Other than no reasonable Mexican Food, Texarkana has a few other quirks I've noticed. 

1. There are no sidewalks. Anywhere. 

2. There are deer crossing signs. IN THE CITY. They are not to be ignored.  

3. Donut shops are a thing. And they are worth every single calorie. 

4. People in cars wave when you walk by (on the street--no sidewalks). I think it is a state law to wave. 

5. It appears that most people feel the need to announce their political affiliation. I don't understand it. Nor do I appreciate it. Other people's politics, sex life and religion should still be left to the imagination.

6. It is customary to be invited to someone's church service. If you don't go to their church, they assume you are a heathen. At which point, not only will the aforementioned church service invite be coming, but so will the invite for Bible study and Sunday school. The exception seems to be the Catholics. Not only do they not have Sunday school but they pretty much don't seem to be recruiting around here.

7. Everyone around here is--and I'm not making this up--about four degrees of separation. I interviewed plumbers for my (hopefully) upcoming bathroom remodel. The one I selected turned out to know my former lawn guy and his wife works with Marty. There were other plumbers I spoke with too--they all knew someone in my former Brokerage.

8. There are two types of folks: the ones who were born and raised in Texarkana and the newcomers. The Born and Raised don't really have much appreciation for the Newcomers--especially if the Newcomers don't go to their church. 

9. Lawn guys are unreliable creatures in Texarkana and should come with a proven clean drug screening. Buckaroo worked for my former lawn guy for about a minute and decided he wasn't into the chemical lifestyle. Incidentally, the plumber I'm using for the (hopefully) upcoming bathroom remodel didn't seem to like my former lawn guy. That was fine with me. 

10. The stuff that matters is cheaper. Gas is under $4 a gallon. My utility bills combined for the month of February were under $250 for water, cable, gas and electric. Eggs and meat are really inexpensive.  

11. City Zoning is a mere suggestion. On the main road near my house you may find the auto detailing place, next to the Barbecue restaurant, next to the nursery, next to a housing subdivision, next to a Baptist Church, next to another Baptist Church, next to the Game Stop, next to another housing subdivision, next to the donut shop. From a large city, it boggles the mind. 

Still need the Blueberry and Blackberry Bushes

The Sunshines spent Saturday working on the gardens. As my garden attempts in Mesa were thwarted with 100+ degree weather and not enough water, I am already having high hopes for this round of plants. 

We wanted raised bed gardening, and that took a bit of work over a couple of weekends.  I put my seedlings out a couple of weeks ago before I was told by one of the Hens at the Old Brokerage that one simply doesn't garden here until after Good Friday. When I tried to explain Good Friday changes based on the moon cycle, I was dismissed as one of those, "Wacky Catholics." But yea, Good Friday isn't a good indicator of weather. Anyway, I have seedlings bursting my my kitchen, looking for soil. 

This week the zucchini will be put in the ground. I'm hoping the lettuce, radishes and tomatoes won't be too far behind. the pepper seedlings are resisting, so they may end up waiting for Good Friday after all. The beans, cucumbers and Polly's prized pumpkins are already flourishing in their new digs.  

We are short on fertilizer--something that happens to be imported from the Ukraine of all places. Instead, we bought a compost bin that will be delivered tomorrow. We also discovered last week that Luna hasn't met a mound of dirt she doesn't like, so we ended up investing in a small fence that seems to be a reasonable deterrent. 

In the front of the house I've got dahlias, sunflowers (can't wait!), tulips, crocus and morning glories. Hopefully this summer I will have a colorful yard and a tasty salad. 

Church

I've been dragging Marty to church for the past few weeks. I go for Jesus and the socialization--I need friends. Marty goes because I ask him to. He's a good husband that way.

Generally we stay after for coffee and donuts, talking to all the folks we meet. Today, I didn't feel like it. I don't have the job I had last week when they asked, and I didn't feel like answering questions about why. "It wasn't a good fit," is 100 percent true, but never satisfies a group of Southern folk who seem to like dirt in places other than their garden.  

That said, I missed this week's donuts and fellowship. Fitting into a new place is hard enough and a church community seems like an obvious place to start without ruffling too many feathers. Maybe after the dust settles this week, we will check out Friday's fish fry. 

The Coronas

Last night, I met the Coronas, a group of women who get together regularly for supper and to play cards. They named themselves that, because they started meeting in the spring of 2020. They are hilarious. I was invited to go to Hot Springs with them today, but I am staying home and working on the garden. 

Tessa is one of the Coronas and she was my ticket in. Hopefully she will invite me back--or someone from that group will reach out. I had a blast and I doubt I've laughed so hard since last time I saw Bliz. 

At any rate, it was nice to get out and be social. It was nice to do something that didn't require me to think about real estate. And it gave me a well-needed break from grieving. All and all, a sunny spot in my new life. 

Retirement, Round 2

I am no longer employed at The Brokerage. I'm ok. Tessa and I are still friendly--in fact, I am going out with her tonight. Whether Tessa invited me out because of pity or true friendship, remains to be seen. Given I have a knife-sized hole in my back from one of her employees, I don't know. But I am curious about Tessa's motive for inviting me. I do like her. I would like to keep that friendship alive. 

At any rate. I saw the writing on the wall last week. Working in an office with 20 Southern women who have mostly known each other and their families from birth wasn't working out. I was getting blamed for the changes in the office (but the paperwork was finally compliant, and it hadn't been before) and the fact that I was an "outsider" was rubbing a few of the more diva-agent types raw. Tessa doesn't like conflict. Even she admitted I did nothing wrong, but I got to be the scapegoat nonetheless. 

That said, I actually resigned in the middle of Tessa firing me. I told her I wasn't a good fit, which we both knew weeks ago. And please, when this comes up, tell the staff it was my choice to leave. I then showed Tessa what I was working on, so that she would be able to talk authoritatively in Monday's meeting with the higher-ups. And, I lobbied for a better desk for Abby and a raise for the woman who stabbed me in the back before I walked out the door. Revenge is living well. Grace will get me farther than rancor.  

My heart is light. I've been laughing all afternoon with Buckaroo as we drove around Texarkana running errands that I hadn't had time to do prior. I think it is safe to say, I am ready for my second round of retirement. At last count, I have five home projects (minus taxes) on my plate that I was doing in my spare time. My family is thrilled I no longer work there and told me so at lunch. I guess my job wasn't a good fit for any of us. 

The Simple Life

I cleaned the house this morning. To be fair, it took me 30 minutes, and that included pulling out the vacuum and talking the cat out from the bedroom closet, where he trembled in total and abject fear of that beast. 

On paper, our house is 300 square feet smaller than the one we left behind in Mesa. In reality, our house is much smaller. The master bathroom, for example, is the size of all three of our bathrooms in Mesa. As a realtor I never understood homeowners who thought having a 10' x 10' master bathroom was ideal. As a homeowner, I still don't get it. Nor do I really understand the appeal of walk-in closets, I mean, other than to give the cat a place to cower. If you think about it, there's a lot of wasted space in walk-in closets. 

Our current house has 5 rooms less than our previous house. It makes a difference in lifestyle. My desk, for example, is currently in the master bedroom, only because Buckaroo and I get along better without us having our desks in such close quarters while he is online with his buddies and I am trying to write. Until we get their bathroom fixed (there is no feasible shower/tub in the hall bathroom), we are all using the master bathroom shower. I miss having a large pantry and laundry room, probably more than I miss having my own office. That kind of lifestyle change. 

But though it has been an adjustment, I like the smaller house. I like how my family talks and interacts more. I like having less to clean, decorate and declutter. I like having my family near and talking and laughing more. I think that's something I didn't know I missed in Mesa: just being part of everyone's day.  

Of course, there are challenges with four adults living in a smaller home. The big one is the daily hourly constant reminders to Polly to put her shit away please pick up her extraneous items and store them in her room. That always never gets old. Then there's the interventions Marty has to do on a daily hourly constant basis to make sure Polly and I don't kill each other over this particular issue. And it isn't just me who is frustrated by this. Buckaroo muttered something about cramming all of her belongings that lay around in the shed. I haven't checked to see if he's done it yet. 

But even with helping Polly develop good adult habits, everything is much more peaceful in our home. A peace we didn't even know we were lacking with the hectic home life we left behind. Having less of everything is so freeing. We laugh more, talk more, interact more. That's better to me than having more possessions and a more complicated life. We might upgrade to a bigger home in the future, but for now I like spending 30 minutes a week cleaning. 

The Futile Quest for Mexican Food

Not gonna lie. The Mexican food in Texarkana is downright horrible. While in Phoenix a few weeks ago, I did a Mexican Food Crawl, and managed to make it to four places that week (and another in Benson, where I saw Mrs. Meadows on my way back to Texas). Oh my! My taste buds rejoiced. 

In our never-ending impossible quest to find something palatable, we turned to our church community this past Sunday. You see, every month or so, there are some Mexico natives who dish up some tamales and burritos for the congregation. Knowing this, we made a special trip for breakfast. 

I'd tell you it was wonderful but we'd both know I was lying. However, it wasn't horrible. At least the tamale had seasoning. The burrito not so much. But it gave us hope. Somewhere nearby there must be a Mexican restaurant with reasonable seasoning and no Hormel Chili or Velveeta. 

Obscure 1970s Reference

The following text occurred Monday: 

Me: I just made the drive from Atlanta (TX) to Texarkana in 35 minutes. Not sure why the Bandit needed 28 hours. 

Darwin: Sally Fields was riding shotgun. 

Here's A Gratuitous Finn Picture

 

I spent the day working on Dad's estate. Though it is pretty easy to deal with (THANK YOU DAD FOR HAVING YOUR AFFAIRS IN ORDER!), it is still tough to see his handwriting, to smile at his voter ID card and to write letters to family friends of Dad's passing. I still need to order the obituary. I haven't yet, because the picture I wanted to add has gotten lost in the transition of all of this. If I haven't found a reasonable substitute by Wednesday I will just do it anyway. 

A Saturday Drive

Somewhere in Arkansas

Saturday morning, with the snow melting, Marty and I set out for Stamps Arkansas. It was a 40 mile trip--about the distance from my house in Mesa to Dad's house, but a much nicer drive. We took the back country roads, debating what part of Arizona the landscape reminded us of. We decided it reminded us of East Texas. Arizona doesn't really have an, "Arkansas back country roads," vibe. 

Our goal was to find the C&C Meat Market, a place located in nowhere*  that was alleged to have reasonable meat prices. We were intrigued. Marty bought some ham hocks for his bean soup and a bit of bacon that made the drive absolutely worth it. We also bought a couple of steaks and a pork loin. All of this was under the usual price we pay at Sam's Club. So, not factoring in the cost of gasoline, we did pretty well.

Somewhere Else in Arkansas

After, we went into Hope Arkansas, the birthplace of former President Bill Clinton and former Arkansas Governor Mike Huckabee. Other than a train station, a sign telling us a University was somewhere nearby and a fabulous burger joint, there wasn't much else. But it was a nice visit anyway. I'd been curious about that town and am no longer so. 

That's Snow on the Roof.
Really

At some point, I need to contact the Hope AK historical society (or whatever variation they have) because my father researched Mrs. Clinton's genealogy back a few generations. My brothers and I thought it might be a nice donation to their records. 

Wall at the Train Station,
Hope AR

We also passed through a town called, "Evening Shade." For those of you who were aware, there was a TV show by the same name that ran in the 1990s. I know nothing about it. And after driving through Evening Shade, I still know nothing about either. 

We took the Interstate back the 30 miles or so back into Texas, happy the weather held up long enough to give us a chance to explore our new world and in time to catch the Texarkana Home and Garden Show. We decided next time we'd try Shreveport (just because and 90 miles away) or Little Rock (Costco and Trader Joes and 140 miles away).  

*The Meat Market was located on the Arthur Fielder Memorial Highway. I don't know why. Artie was born, raised and left this earth in Boston MA. But it was still kind of cool. I Googled around and couldn't find any mention of why this patch of nowhere was named after him. But let the music live on! 

The Texarkana Home Show

Oh small town life...

So the Texarkana Home Show was quickly whipped together by the Powers that Be, and held in the Arkansas Convention Center. Why? Because the Texarkana Convention Center was already being used for the Gun Show. And let me just say, the parking lot for the Texarkana Convention Center was packed-full when Marty and I showed up at the wrong event. 

It turns out that the Texarkana Home Show should not have been competing with the Gun Show. The only vendors in place were the four real estate companies in town, three title companies, two banks, one mortgage broker and the Texas-Arkansas Board of Realtors. There also was a roofer and two home inspectors. Habitat for Humanity had a table and a few magnets laying out, but nobody manned their table. Marty and I were the only participants when we showed up around 1 p.m. And frankly, Marty was only there because it was part of our marital vows. 

In some ways it was great for me. I showed up to support my team. But I had a better opportunity to meet the folks at three different title companies, two banks, one mortgage broker and three other real estate offices, who do business with my company. When I said, "I work for Tessa," they all knew who she was. Tessa doesn't need a last name in Texarkana. 

What was really fun was that many of them I'd spoken with on the phone or they had heard of me through Tessa. The woman from the Board of Real Estate seemed to know my background better than I did and asked when I would be coming on board as an agent. I told her I'd rather teach--but I need a license to do that too in Texas. She said we'd be talking. She also reminded me about the luncheon this coming Wednesday that I hadn't RSVP'd to yet for managers and brokers. I won't be going, but shucks, it was nice to be invited. 

It was interesting to observe Tessa watch me network. When I am with her, I am overshadowed. Tessa likes to command the room. I'm not a command the room kind of girl and have no desire to be that person. But I can hold my own. And I know she saw that. I wasn't there to sell anyone a home, but to make a few contacts to help my agents and perhaps recruit a few agents away from the three other real estate brokers in town. 

First Day Back at Work

Though I love my young adults, even I can see the benefits of stepping back here and there and giving them space. Unfortunately, Texas winter weather coupled with the size of my home doesn't really warrant itself to "space." So Friday, grieving my father, I put on my lip gloss, fluffed my hair and drove the four miles to my office where I hoped to get a reprieve. Dad would have approved. He was a hard worker.  

What I got at the office was a mound of paperwork and Tessa having a bad day. Figuring I'd work half a day, I didn't bring lunch, which was a bad move. Lesson learned. I ended up staying until 4:30 when my assistant, Abby shoed me out, reminding me it was snowing and I wasn't even supposed to be in the office anyway.  

Abby also overheard me stand my ground with Tessa, who at one point in the afternoon took a pot shot at me. Tessa needs me more than I need her, and I calmly reminded her of that and let her know I would not tolerate that kind of behavior. So, Abby also overheard Tessa's apology. 

While in Vegas three weeks ago (it feels like a million years ago), Tessa introduced me to the higher-ups as her "future broker." I haven't signed on board for that just yet. I have some thinking to do. However, if Tessa's moment Friday was an anomaly, then I will continue thinking about it. If it becomes a habit, then nope. I'm gone. 

Easing Back Into the Swing of Things

After being gone 16 days, I arrived back in Texarkana yesterday, having driven for two days and 1,300 miles. I would have preferred the airplane-kind of ride, even with the three hours back from the Dallas airport of my choice, but I was taking Dad's car back to Buckaroo. In case it doesn't seem terribly obvious, I don't like driving. Especially through West Texas. 

Today I spent all sorts of time and energy sorting out Dad's papers I hadn't gotten to last week. Fortunately, my father's affairs were in order and his modest estate isn't terribly hard to settle. But there are a few hiccups here and there.

I'd told Tessa I'd be back in the office on Thursday. Today I swung by the office to tell her, nope. Maybe Friday, but even I can see that might be optimistic. While there, I glanced at my desk and the piles of paper waiting for me and backed away slowly. My work-a-holic personality isn't ready for anything that dramatic.